“This is my life, I will control it and do with it what I want”

Sometimes we get so wrapped up in our everyday lives, in trying to get everything done and fitting everything in we can’t relax and let go for even a minute. I am a natural control freak, a workaholic who can’t twitch off, and I was completely in control in control of my life, until I met a guy. The details are irrelevant, but what is relevant is that we were going somewhere, and I had no control. It was his call to either bring us together or let it run its course. But the thing that surprised me the most, was how nice it was to not be in control. It was almost liberating to hand over the reins and let someone else decide. Not because I didn’t want us to happen – I really did -, just because that’s the way it happened. Rather than fighting for results and constantly worrying what was going, I just let him decide.

Just to step back and ride with it was a whole new experience, and one I would recommended. Just to be able to say “OK, you’re in control” is hard enough if you’re of the same control freak mindset as me, and it may seem selfish and mean to lump all the responsibility and stress on some one else, but he was more than capable of handling it, as long as you put the reins in the hands of someone who can cope, you’ll be fine. In fact, you’ll be more than fine, you’ll be freed. You as the control freak will get liberation and some rest as well as a new experience and the other person will get experience and self-confidence. But remember, just because you hand over the reins doesn’t mean you can just step back and not pay attention, you need to keep a watchful eye on what is going on with the situation, to make sure it’s all working out as it should, but don’t stare, or you’ll snatch back control and neither of you will benefit.

It’s a two person coalition and a delicate balance of control and watching. The results will come, just take time to let them happen and it’s all the sweeter when they do.

You just have to trust.

“To approach the stranger is to invite the unexpected, release a new force, let the genie out of the bottle. It is to start a new train of events that is beyond your control…” ~T.S. Eliot~

“Control is never achieved when sought after directly. It is the surprising outcome of letting go.”~James Arthur Ray~

“The closest to being in control we will ever be is in that moment that we realize we’re not.” ~Brian Kessler~

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